I work in the Arts & Crafts Section and I can’t remember the name of my first dog. I.e, Is my life a failure?

Why do people take the spot next to the window on the bus when they only have two stops? Since when has it become commonplace to careen about a shop with a hot beverage in the vicinity of printed matter? Would I be different if I drank coffee instead of tea? What happened to the jewelry box I hand painted for my mother when I was in summer camp? How often do they vacuum this carpet? How long could I go without food before I felt sick? Isn’t it amazing that only a painted yellow line keeps strangers from hurtling into one another with their cars? How many people has my sister had sex with? How could the postmaster have allowed 100 ducklings to die in a box before they could be delivered- wasn’t there some indication that they were ever so much more than fragile? Will I ever like to exercise? The question was never, why did my mother do it, but rather, why did she wait so long?
What is the appeal of monogrammed tote bags? Shouldn’t people declare sand in their sneakers on a custom form? How did my father make it through the day on just one half of a grapefruit?
If books cost less, would more people get published? If I wrote a book, would I be considered ungracious if I left out a thank-you section? Why do so many American women have highlights? How did the lobster feel when my mother placed him on the floor of our black and white kitchen in order to scare, or to impress us? Will I have this job for the rest of my life, or will I die beforehand?
Why do the ridges of my socks stay imprinted on my skin so much longer than other people’s? Why in the world would I ever want to order a blueberry latté? What happened to my childhood furniture after my father moved in with the woman in the leggings? How come there are never any people of color in the Fiction section of this bookshop, is it because I live in Connecticut? Why does adding an additional ‘p’ and ‘e’ to the end of “shop” automatically cause one to associate the venue with Christmas? Does anyone know the difference between a sheriff and a cop?
Do people actually forget that they have half a sandwich in the staff refrigerator, or do they intend, one day, to suddenly remember –hooray!- I have half a sandwich in the staff refrigerator?
Am I too old to wear a bib? Is it human to not allow us to sit down? How many people out there actually create things with pipe cleaners any more and where in the world would you buy some if you wanted to?
Do only men build model trains? Why do guests never use the guest soap you leave on the top of the carefully folded towels on their bed?
Why can’t I remember the name of my first dog?
Isn’t there another location for a nametag than on top of my left breast?